An introduction by Susan Romer
Today, most children placed for adoption know they were adopted. Many have an open relationship with their birth parents. Openness varies with each family, depending on how much, or what type of contact they have. Sometimes there are visits, but often it means texts, letters, FaceTime or now, Zoom.
Research has shown that birth parents as well as adoptees do better when they know each other. Children grow up knowing that they have a Mom that gave birth to them - their birth Mom (or tummy Mom), and a Mom and Dad / two Moms / two Dads / a Mom / a Dad that raises them.
The child knows their story, so no one “slips” and accidentally tells them they are adopted. Not knowing one is adopted and finding this out from others can lead to anger and a lack of trust in their parents. Secrets are never healthy.
Reading this book with your child while they are very young helps you to get used to telling your child their story.
This book aims to encourage openness. Advice is, don’t wait for your child to ask questions. It’s very common for children not to ask questions, particularly about their birth parents. This can be because they don’t know to ask, or what to ask about, or because they don’t want to hurt their parents’ feelings. Each time you read this book with your child encourage them to ask you questions.